What just happened? Where am I? How did this happen? The searing pain radiating from my neck to my head answered at least one of my questions—I was alive. Sitting on a snowy slope in Beaver Creek, Colorado, I realized I had just taken a nasty fall while skiing. The reality of the situation hit me like the chill blowing across the mountain: I wasn’t okay. I had no idea how serious things were, but thankfully, I wasn’t alone.
That day, I had been skiing with a friend—a relatively new acquaintance but an experienced first responder in wilderness emergencies. He immediately took control of the situation, calmly assessing my condition, contacting ski patrol, and ensuring I was transported safely down the mountain in a ski toboggan. The surreal series of events that followed ended with me in the intensive care unit of the nearest hospital.
Within a few hours, I learned the gravity of my injury: I had broken my neck. As the ER doctor explained, I was just millimeters away from a far worse outcome—one that doesn’t leave you skiing or walking ever again. Within 24 hours, I was in surgery to repair my neck, and while the procedure addressed the immediate damage, I knew the road ahead was going to be long and uncertain.
But I wasn’t prepared for the lesson that came next: the remarkable power of support.
The Village That Appeared
When you’re navigating the unexpected, the first instinct is often to retreat into yourself. I’ve always been the kind of person who tells myself, I’ve got this. I’ll figure it out. But in those first 48 hours, it became glaringly obvious—I didn’t “have this.” My physical recovery would take months, if not years, and the emotional toll was something I couldn’t even begin to process.
And then, something amazing happened. People—family, friends, colleagues—just showed up.
We had recently moved to a new community, and our local connections were still limited. My wife and I were juggling two young kids, two dogs, and a busy life. Yet, despite all the complexities of modern life, friends and family dropped everything to support us.
Some drove considerable distances—hours on the road—to be by my side. It was as though a giant, invisible network of care had been activated overnight.
Leaning In
What struck me most about this experience was how instinctive it was for people to help. They didn’t ask permission. They didn’t wait for an invitation. They leaned in.
Several friends and family members didn’t hesitate to come to our aid. Some sat with me in the hospital; others supported my wife, juggling the chaos of young kids, dogs, and a household that felt completely upside-down. These were people with busy lives of their own, yet they showed up in ways I’ll never forget.
My work colleagues rallied as well, offering support in ways that went beyond what I could have imagined. People didn’t just offer help; they took action.
Rallying Around Each Other
Looking back, I’ve realized that the same principles of leaning in apply far beyond personal challenges. Whether in work, community, or everyday life, the ability to recognize when help is needed—and step in—can make all the difference.
Unexpected challenges, whether in business or life, often leave us hesitant to ask for support, fearing it’s a sign of weakness. But true strength lies in acknowledging that we can’t do it all alone—and in allowing others to step up.
Equally important is how we show up for others. Whether it’s a colleague, a neighbor, or a friend facing difficulties, leaning in and asking, What can I do? matters. In my case, people didn’t wait for me to ask—they just acted. And that’s a lesson I’ve carried forward: don’t wait for permission to help—just step in.
A Lesson in Humanity
A few years after my accident, I had the chance to reflect on this experience in a deeply personal way. I was invited to speak at a TEDx event, where I shared my story on stage with a close friend. Together, we talked about the importance of showing up for one another—especially during times of crisis.
What made this talk unique was the perspective we shared as two men. Let’s face it: men aren’t always great at talking about emotions or vulnerability. But standing on that stage, recounting how my community rallied around me, I couldn’t help but get emotional. Even now, years later, the memory brings a lump to my throat.
The truth is, our society often celebrates independence, resilience, and self-sufficiency. But what my accident taught me—and what I hope to pass on to you—is the importance of interdependence. It’s okay to need help. It’s okay to lean on others. In fact, allowing people to support you can be one of the greatest gifts you give them.
Why This Matters
Life has a way of throwing curveballs when you least expect them. Maybe it’s an accident, a diagnosis, a job loss, or some other unexpected event that shakes your world. In those moments, it’s natural to feel overwhelmed, to wonder how you’re going to make it through.
But here’s what I learned: the people around you are stronger and more generous than you realize. They’ll show up when you need them most. And if you’re fortunate enough to be the one who’s not in crisis, then you have an opportunity—a responsibility, even—to lean in and support those who are.
Whether it’s cooking a meal, watching someone’s kids, offering to cover a shift, or simply sitting with someone in silence, these acts of kindness are what get people through life’s toughest moments.
The Ripple Effect
Reflecting on my accident now, I realize how transformative that experience was—not just for me, but for everyone involved. The support I received created a ripple effect, inspiring me to be more intentional about showing up for others.
So, the next time someone you know is navigating the unexpected, don’t wait for them to ask for help. Step in. Be the friend, family member, or colleague who leans in. And if you’re the one going through it, don’t be afraid to let others help you. You might be surprised by how much love and strength surrounds you.
In the end, navigating the unexpected isn’t just about survival—it’s about connection. It’s about leaning on each other and recognizing that, together, we can get through anything.
If you’d like to hear more about my story, I encourage you to check out my TEDx talk, Everyone has a story to tell, what’s yours? | Brent Drever | TEDxVail (~7 minute video), where I dive deeper into the power of community and friendship. It’s a reminder that even in our most vulnerable moments, we are never truly alone.
See you next week,
Brent, your Rivr Guide
